THE SWITCH FROM "LONGING" TO "SAVORING"

I am not sure that we, as people, are programmed to not "long" for something. It seems so natural. The whole "grass is greener" bit. But, there is a fine line between setting goals for the future and truly longing for something that you do not currently have in your life. I was struck by this thought one evening in the middle of a conversation with a much older gentleman.

You see, that very same week, I was thinking about how nice it will be whenever my kids are grown and out of the house. (Cough) Yeah, so they are 2 and 8 months…not really happening tomorrow! This conversation really touched me because earlier that week, I had just dreamily mentioned to my husband (no less, after the millionth horrid diaper that I had changed that day), about how fun it will be for us to just go whenever – wherever – however and watch a sunset on the beach – something to that effect.

Well, back to the older gentleman. He said, "Wow, you had better really enjoy this time with your kids. It's a wonderful time. I just packed away our last son and sent him to college. It's so quiet in the house now." That got me thinking how much we (sometimes) long our lives away. It's pretty sad if you dwell on it, but that's why I am writing this entry. It's a way to say – let's not long our lives away – but truly savor every moment.

Here is how I think it breaks down (in most cases):

Baby – Longing to eat, sleep and have that disgusting diaper changed!

Toddler – Longing to communicate and, of course, be the boss.

Kid – Realizing (hopefully) that he/she is indeed not the boss. Longing to be a "cool" teenager instead.

Teenager – Longing for a license to drive, get out of high school and be "free."

College Student – Longing to get out of school and be "free."

Single/Working Person – Longing to get married.

Married Person – Longing for kids, and then the other kid, etc., perhaps a dog or cat!

Once you Have Kids – Longing for peace, sleep, relaxation, and for them to grow up a little and not be so darn needy.

Once your Kids aren't so Needy – What happened? Longing to connect with your kids.

Once your Kids are out of the House – Longing for a full house again. Noise, excitement.

Grandparent Stage – Longing for grandchildren.

Older People – Longing for retirement.

Retired People – Longing for company from friends and family, something useful and meaningful to do, or simply, the way things used to be in the world – the past.

So, instead of longing for things, why not savor what you have? After all, you spend "however" many years longing for it! Enjoy each stage, truly savor everything. Even if you are not destined for marriage or having children, there are other things that you can do that a married person with children might not be able to do as readily. So, it's all in the way that you look at things. The point is to not get stuck in doom and gloom and longing because it's not worth it. We are all on this planet for some reason, and so, embrace the time that you have, and try to make a difference without longing your life away!